Relax - Be Stress Free '

Relax - Be Stress Free

Our life is shaped by our mind for

 We become what we think

Buddha

"Calm mind brings inner strength and self-confidence, so that's very important for good health."

 Dalai Lama

Anybody can tell you to relax, in the modern terminology to chill or Thand Rakh in Punjabi, keep calm, when it comes to reality it is much difficult than said more so when relaxation is needed most from stress.

It's a good idea always to do something relaxing prior to making an important decision in your life.

                                                                           PAULO COELHO

If a man insisted always on being serious, and never allowed himself a bit of fun and relaxation, he would go mad or become unstable without knowing it.                                                                                                                        HERODOTUS

Most mums declare they just don't have the time in this season of life to do the things they would enjoy, the things that fill them up and restore them. Relaxation is a remote idea. But just like any job, you need to have breaks, recharge your batteries and make sure you can continue to do your job without burning out.

                                                                          JODY ALLEN

Doing something positive will help turn your mood around. When you smile, your body relaxes. When you experience human touch and interaction, it eases tension in your body.

                                                                  SIMONE ELKELES

Relaxation of mind and body are two different things. It is much easier to relax the body as compared to the mind that is what we are concerned here. Mind is not the brain it is not solid piece of flesh and blood. It is something which has to do with your soul, conscious, habits, character, genes, bringing up and what you think of yourself, your achievements, failures, your aspirations and so many other things. It is so complex and intricate that needs prudence, wisdom, intelligence, a connect with Him and your own-self. This is, in fact, something transcendental. Had it been simple there would have been no cases of stress, in fact stress would have been unknown to the world. Still it is part and parcel of our existence on this planet and we must make an effort to understand and relax it.

How to relax mind. There is no standard operating procedure that makes the mind to relax. Fundamental is that the one should move to a situation, thought other than the one creating stress.

New is very dear to mind. Find something in your surroundings like new clothes, different kind of food, purchasing, shopping, new friend, meeting different persons they will take you away from your surroundings. New is always absorbing and involving, it attracts, so you feel away from your present situation.

What you like to do again and again, your favorite hobby, whatever you do for your livelihood if it becomes your hobby you need not work again. Those who have tasted job-satisfaction they never work and work every day free of tensions and stress and the best.

Creativity is the jewel of humanity. It takes a person near to the Creator. Creativity is the act of turning new and imaginative ideas into reality. It takes you away and nearer to from where creativity emanates.

Innovation when you do, that you have been doing for long time, in a new way, procedure, method that proves fruitful it takes you away from the present scene of turbulence and you feel happy and satisfied.

A connect with Him by meditation, prayer or otherwise provides your mind relaxation the extreme. Mind is free of every thought; it is just vacuum, a bliss, once experienced never leaves and one remains always free of stress. Whole Universe surrenders to the mind that is still.

When we pray, we relax, reflect, and renew our commitments to God.

                                                          David DeNotaris

A pleasant contact: There are always persons whom we love to be in accompany of, may be your father, mother, spouse, children, friend or any other. Spending some minutes with such a person gives mind the much need rest, relaxation and solace.

A pleasant visit: some places like a beach, park, temple, a restaurant attract you most; a visit to such place is solace giving and involving and makes you stress-free.

Mindfulness a mental state achieved by focusing one's awareness on the present moment. Just concentrate on what you are doing. Be where you are. Enjoy the moment you have do not regret what you do not have.

Pets when they jump to your lap, follow you everywhere, wait for you at the house gate; not only they make they presence felt but send you where you have never gone - cosy affectionate feel, a living entertainer, eye to eye, tail to tail. They shift your focus and attention and thus provide stress relief may be for a few minutes.

Romance not necessarily sexual one; although sex has its own importance and a place in stress management, may be with stamps, gardening, central spread of the newspapers, may be of hills or sea beaches, dunes in Jaisalmer or snow covered peaks of Dholadhar etc. Romance with your own-self, is something unique, unless you are romantic with self, you can’t be romantic with anything else.

One of my seniors had a special romance for stamps not just collection of stamps a hobby, but a deep study of all aspects of a small piece of paper – he used to ensure quick delivery of all new issue of stamps whether regular or commemoratives and finally that earned him PadmaShri- are one of the highest civilian honours of India announced annually on the eve of Republic Day.

Supernatural friends. I know the people who make friend with their deity, they talk to them, feed them, make them to take bath, change their clothes, awake them and send them to sleep also. Sometimes they carry their image with them. They are always available to them in every circumstances. Severe are the circumstances nearer are they to these friends. People just surrender and enjoy their company and feel stress free and relaxed.  

Something special: While driving from Delhi to Chandigarh, we used to pass by a Samadhi of a Peer. When we read about this Samadhi in one of the magazines we started stopping there on the road side for a moment to pay obeisance. One day we went to the Samadhi deep down from the road by about 20-25 feet. While I was stepping down I felt some force is just pulling me towards itself. I felt so astonished but it gave me lot of relief and solace. I do not know what it was, but was wonderful and positive.

Music is not just drum beating. It is enjoying every beat of the drum and to harmonize with harmonium. Clarinet has rich sound quality. Classical Indian music has its own charm and so are the various ragas and styles. But most important of all instruments is space reached by the sound in ears. How attentive and receptive it is to the music. If you are involved you are lost that is the beauty of the music and that can take you away from where you happen to be and de-stress.  

   

Fundamental of mental relaxation is simple; that you must involve in the activity from the core of your heart, only then you would move away from the present position.

"Work is man's most natural form of relaxation."

                                                             Dagobert D. Runes

Silence A Tool for Stress Management

Silence

A Tool for Stress Management

Observe and Reap

I am silence among secrets.

Lord Krishna

Bhagavad Gita (10.38)

Silence is the first door to spiritual eminence.                                       

                                                          Adi Sanakaracharya

The food of soul is silence and if we do not practice silence we are starving ourselves.

                                                            Dada J.P.Vaswani

Silence is the language that God speaks and every other thing is a bad translation.

                                                             Thomas Keating

God has been everlastingly working in silence unobserved, unheard except by those who experience His infinite silence.

                                                              Mehar Baba

Prayer within breath is silence,

Love within infinity is silence,

Wisdom without words is silence,

Action without a doer is silence,

Smiling with all existence is silence.

                                                          Sri Sri Ravi Shankar

Silence is the true friend that never betrays.

                                                                  Confucius

Silence is the source of great strength.

                                                                  Lao Tzu

True silence is the rest of the mind, it is to the spirit what sleeps is to the body, nourishment and refreshment.

                                                                 William Penn

We need to find God and He cannot be found in noise and restlessness. God is friend of silence.

                                                                 Mother Teresa

“He who does not understand your silence will probably not understand your words.”

                                                                Elbert Hubbard

“Work hard in silence, let your success make the noise.”            

                                                                  Frank Ocean

 “Silence is the great teacher, and to learn its lessons you must pay attention to it. There is no substitute for the creative inspiration, knowledge, and stability that come from knowing how to contact your core of inner silence. The great Sufi poet Rumi wrote, Only let the moving waters calm down, and the sun and moon will be reflected on the surface of your being.” –               

                                                                 Deepak Chopra 

                                                           

“I often regret that I have spoken; never that I have been silent.”                                                                    Publilius Syrus

“Everything that’s created comes out of silence. Thoughts emerge from the nothingness of silence. Words come out of the void. Your very essence emerged from emptiness. All creativity requires some stillness.”

                                                                     Wayne Dyer

Nothing strengthens authority so much as silence.

                                                             

                                                                   Leonardo da Vinci

Choose silence of all virtues, for by it you hear other men’s imperfections, and conceal your own.

                                                                    George Bernard Shaw

“Hazaaron Jawabon Se Acchi Hai Meri Khamoshi,

Na Jaane Kitne Sawaalon Ki Aabru Rakhe.”

                                                                          Manmohan Singh

(Translation: My silence is better than a thousand answers as it upholds the honour of innumerable questions)

Mauni Amavasya is believed to be the day when the universe was created. On this day, a vow of complete silence is observed: Maun Vrat. This vow is assumed to control our senses and engage them into the service of the Supreme.

                                                                   Shruti-Smriti

Thus so much has been said by the Master of Masters and great men about silence. Speech is silver, but silence is golden that is the wisdom of ages, sages, saints, scholars and scientists also.

Keeping quiet helps to observe more. It allows the mind to analyze the situation, to think ways and means to defuse the situation. It avoids immediate reaction. Through silence we can actually reach deep into our subconscious mind and find happiness, balance and wisdom.

We should observer physical silence everyday for some time when we need not speak anything while doing everything. After a practice of some months increasing the time of observing silence slowly one would start realizing its benefits and subsequently this practice can be shifted to your mind. Make it silent which enjoins that the mind should not think about anything, it should be just empty a vacuum.  If one is able to achieve that goal, he achieves what is called Samadhi. This journey from speech to silence and then from silence to Samadhi is very difficult but it pays rich dividends not only in de-stressing but it brings you the bliss of Godly inner peace and self-realization. In fact, it is concentrated meditation which is non-dualistic state of consciousness in which the consciousness of the experiencing subject becomes one with the experienced object.

Silence is in fact language of prayer, of meditation, of progress, of development, of growth, of success and of nature. All good things are given and taken in silence. Romance, sex, love, affection, compassion, likes, charity, penance, kindness, obeisance, worship, obedience, regards  all are well performed in silence than in speech, as soon as you speak about them they lose their meaning and purpose, in fact it gives them the opposite meaning and become fruitless, a sin in His Court and arrogance in surroundings. Silence is supreme, beautiful and fruitful. 

Silence is perfect and complete; there are no ifs and buts, no blames and no arguments, no statements no confusions; there is clarity, cleanliness and purity. It white in colour and stands with truth.

Silence is the most perfect language; if you are unable to understand somebody’s silence you would fail to understand his voice also. This is particularly true when parents turn old rather very old and it is for the family members or their keepers to understand what they need or intend to do. If you happen to visit an old age home try to read the silence on the old wrinkled faces and peep into the circumstances that brought them to the old age home. Sometimes they sit outside their home on the road side waiting for someone to listen their silence; nobody comes and one day they are silent forever.

Physical silence gives you physical strength; it gives rest to vocal cords so helplessly in need of it, it save energy and the flames that erupt as a result of anger when you argue yourself right. Flames that we see when someone bursts are really red and hot and can burn anything and sometimes both irreparably. There is no substitute for silence.

              

Silence is peace,

Silence is self,

Silence is bliss,

Silence is He and His

Silence is not golden; it is GOLD.

Effective Communication for Managers

Effective Communication for Managers

Speak and Mean It

Kind words can be short and easy to speak, but their echoes are truly endless.

                                                                  Mother Teresa

Who are managers? Are the special in an organizations? Simple answer to these questions is “yes”. They are CEOs in their own realm of duties and assignments. They are accountable, responsible 24x7 and have to deliver without excuse once accepted the assignment. They have to take the work from their work-force and deliver it to the management. Sometimes their position is like that of a drum beaten from both sides; seniors ask for delivery and the junior are not able to come up to the expectations of the manager. So managers are special people they are pivots which move the system for higher productivity, profits and good values:

1. Managers are a team members; rather they own a team. Team means -Together Everyone Achieves More (TEAM). A team must produce more than the sum total of team members individual capacity put together. It is really a tough task to produce such a team.

2. They are the leaders, captains, ideally first among the equals and have to lead in every situation more so in difficult, awkward, emergent and unforeseen ones so have to communicate brief and effective.

“The Art Of Communication Is The Language Of Leadership.”                                      – James Humes

3. They co-ordinate efforts of all the team members playing with the strengths and shielding the weaknesses of each one to maximize the output. They also tame peers for outputs effecting their own performance

4. They manage men especially difficult ones, environment-more adverse, circumstances-unseen ones to see everything is smooth friction free.

5. They deal with fire-works when the management is in trouble because of national and international odds. They have to douse the flames with their creativity and experience.

So every manager should be expert in effective communication – he should be able to establish complete identity between the words, thoughts, view, manners, tone and toner of what is being said and what is being heard.

“Communication is a skill that you can learn. It's like riding a bicycle or typing. If you're willing to work at it, you can rapidly improve the quality of every part of your life.”                       – Brian Tracy

Essentials of effective managerial communication:

1. Every individual is unique, his person, needs, character, beliefs, self-esteem, responsibility taking, attitude towards life, expectations and so on. He is, in fact, a unique personality. A manager must keep all this in view while communicating with men oral or written.

2. Every individual has personal styles like listening, eye-contact, delivery, credit sharing, speaking, expression, and owning the blame when things fail.

3. Listening skills of the manager are critical to the effective managerial communication. He must listen with sincerity which is a morale booster for employees; not doing anything nor even drafting the response to what is being said. Listening is a discipline and decorum and a much serious than speaking so pay full attention to the person speaking.

“I remind myself every morning: Nothing I say this day will teach me anything. So if I'm going to learn, I must do it by listening.”        – Larry King

4. Speaking skills – an asset with manager. They must speak in a way people like to listen; effective, short and simple, straight and understandable, in the language dear to the other person.

“Storytellers, By The Very Act Of Telling, Communicate A Radical Learning That Changes Lives And The World: Telling Stories Is A Universally Accessible Means Through Which People Make Meaning.”             – Chris Cavanaugh

5. Effective questions- short and simple, clear and exact, no hidden agenda, pointed towards the required information, direct to the employee concerned get a manager to the depth of a problem. Think before asking.

6. Have stern face when needed, must assert themselves as the Boss-Built on Self Success. Must have the courage to ask hard and inconvenient questions in the interest of the organization and integrity of his employees and himself.

7. As every employee is unique so are the ways in which he can be motivated. Each one can’t be motivated the same way always. Needs change with the passage of time and your stage in the organization. A manager must keep a watch on each employee to find out what motivates him the most. It is very searching process as most of the employee keep their problems and requirements away from the office colleagues more so from their immediate boss. Some general patron of the demands can help to some extent but more exact a manager is more fruitful and productive would be his efforts.

8. Make every employee an asset not a liability. Employees contribute to the success of the manager; his career and development in the organization. Every individual has weaknesses and strengths too. Manager’s job is to use strengths and shield weaknesses. Job-profiles can be suitably adjusted and right man placed for a right duty chart only. This will increase effectiveness of communication and also reduce the quantum of speech.

In fact, a manager must know every movement of each face contour of his each team member and how a person is likely to react with each reaction on his face. It is the sum-total of effective managerial communication.

Benefits of effective managerial communication:

1. Real Team. Team is not a group of people, it is a group of those who compliment and supplement each other; exploit the merits and take care of demerits. If your communication is effective it is possible to have and ideal team of your dreams; whose people like to be part of.

2. Home Like atmosphere. Home is place where there is love and affection. There is nothing like home in office; if the people long for office; they are proud to be part of it; their faces glow on entering office and they are devoted to work; treat it as a hobby then a manager has succeeded in creating a home in office and the benefits are limitless.

3. No fear of ridicule when asking for guidance: Nobody is trained as per the job profile despite being in business school or a training class. On the job training knowingly or inadvertently is must, it makes you practical, creates capable and skillful executives. If the communication with managers, bosses and seniors is effective everybody is able to bring perfection in his job, it removes the fear of ridicule and everybody is too open to ask for the minute clarifications and basis of the intricacies and that ensures minute appreciation of the facts.

4. Quick resolution of problems. Effective communication means it is free, frank, with the positivity of the criticism and a senior’s advice. Obviously the problems would get reduced to the minimum and resolved with goodwill and appreciation.

5. Increase in productivity. When the work-force more specifically your own teams moves like a well-oiled machine; the productivity has to increase and may sometimes be in a proportion, not heard of in similar situations.

6. Clear official goals with purpose and direction: Effective managerial communication is of great help in clarifying to the staff complexities, time frame and confidential nature of the organizational goals.

7. Decorum and discipline are tools that increase the effectiveness of the action and help in reaching the target. Effective communication is the foundation of decorum and discipline so essential to increase the output.

“Most Of The Successful People I've Known Are The Ones Who Do More Listening Than Talking.” –           

                                                           Bernard Baruch

An effective manager must listen what is not being said verbally and must read what is not written.

Want To Be C.E.O. Then Become

Want To Be

C.E.O.

Then Become

It is so easy. Own an enterprise and run it for your livelihood. You are the CEO. Is it really that easy? Yes, if you have certain ingredients. Everybody in your small enterprise will look up to you for guidance for action or restraint, betterment, delivery and disposal, innovation & creativity, in emergencies or otherwise; you are the boss; even if there is no other person, you have to guide your own destiny with care and caution so that it makes a sense and creates a space for you in the society-the urge inside that would make you successful.  

But every person can’t own an enterprise nor everyone in an enterprise become CEO. There has to be one CEO only may be a collective one like a Cabinet in a country or a Board of Directors in a company despite this CEO culminates only into a Prime Minister or a Managing Director. It is singular, plurals are not known to this terminology.

It is position which carries with it responsibilities, duties, accountabilities, challenges, odds, known or unknown, calculated or limitless without excuses and 24x7. Like Corona the unknown and hidden but man did what he could to save fellow beings. You have to perform & deliver irrespective of the circumstances and environment, emergencies and normal, natural and unnatural not only for yourself, for others also that is the most important part. One has to deal with different types of people and every time ensure success of the organization.

It requires education, skill, knowledge, experience, capacity to penetrate and persist, integrity, devotion, shouldering responsibility, dedication, stick to it attitude and strength of the character. In addition a CEO has to possess are many other qualities.

I do not think that there is any other quality so essential to success of any kind as the quality of perseverance. It overcomes almost everything, even nature.

                                                                    John D. Rockefeller

A CEO must have intrinsic faculties of character- those which are not acquired by education or experience. These are inbuilt, the gifts from God: good health, high immunity level, courage, accurate self-analysis of self-assets and liabilities, conviction, morality, inner peace and happiness, physique -that has its own role to play in impressing others; although this is God given but it has a role; however world has seen exceptions where people with deficiencies have enriched the human race and so on.

A sense to understand what is time- missing in many of us -not the time management in the modern sense, is another characteristic of a successful CEO. A clear heart and a rational head is again a nature’s gift that would help to manage life and livelihood.

“There’s an entrepreneur right now, scared to death, making excuses, saying, ‘It’s not the right time just yet.’ There’s no such thing as a good time. I started an apparel-manufacturing business in the tech-boom years. I mean, come on. Get out of your garage and go take a chance, and start your business.”

                                                                                         Kevin Plank

It’s not about having a specific set time; both personal and professional lives are 24/7. It’s simply, more about making the right allocation to each one and recognizing that it’s going to be different every single day”

                                                                                       Michael Dell

CEO should be daring and different as the circumstances demand; no calculation; no botheration about results and consequences but a determined definite a spontaneous response. Reconnaissance men tell a Commanding Officer enemy tank regiment about to attack any time, he orders his tanks to attack right then, battle is won war is over. CO gets a charge sheet for sending tanks without air cover; inquiry is over, case goes to the competent authority for quantum of punishment: case received back;

“We were the winners because CO was daring and different. Issue him letter of commendation”.

CEO has to be a good listener with eyes wide open: should listen what is being said & also the corridor gossip about health of the organization, market stories and then sieve all for appropriate action. A walk through the corridors must enlighten the head how organization is moving-fast & steady or slow and depressed.    

He has to be smarter than his people-colleagues, workforce, subordinates, suppliers, vendors and researchers: smartness should be tempered with positivity for action for his people and the organization. Smartness with negativity hits hard the initiative and creativity of the people, and the institution he is leading. It turns the people off - work force achieves just the targets and is off the extra mile.

Dignity and honour very pious words. A CEO has to maintain and up hold the dignity of the office he is holding and also take care of others in this matter and always appreciate the good work done immediately and in a dignified manner. The veil of dignity can bring out the most secret information that is adversely affecting the health of any organization. Junior most must get the most dignified behavior and response.

Seniors in an organization have many things to advance  and benefit; junior have slightly less but they feel motivated and encouraged to do better if the seniors have courage to confess ignorance and personal fault when something goes wrong. As rightly said:

A man must be big enough to admit his mistakes, smart enough to profit from them, and strong enough to correct them.

                                                                        John C. Maxwell

A CEO is always different than the person who is CEO: that is the only effective way to deal with varied people in a sensible manner. He should able to avoid personal offence; should know when to offend and when to persuade. If a person is not able to understand this differentiation; he has sown the seeds of failure.

A CEO should always use institutional resources that is way to strengthen the organization and its systems and if you happen to rely on yourself and your resources those will be available to you alone and not to the system you are head of.

Every action should be authentic from the core of one’s heart. Perfunctory, sensational, childish and dramatic action can kill in five minutes the reputation, goodwill built with sustained efforts over decades.

Vision statements by the systems; beautify printed and framed are just the jugglery of words drafted by the professionals not concerned with the job. Real vision is somewhere else; in the mind of the CEO that changes with circumstances, technology, competition & competence, to be miles ahead of others. A CEO has to be doing the most important & critical jobs which may other are hesitant to undertake; like negotiations, plants visits at night, surprise inventory checks etc.

"You don’t have to be a genius or a visionary or even a college graduate to be successful. You just need a framework and a dream."                                                                                             - Michael Dell

We are really competing against ourselves, we have no control over how other people perform.

                                                                                         Mark Zuckerberg

Passion is a great asset of achievers, unless one is passionate. He can’t achieve, so is with nobody-knows qualities-the X -factors-exceptional qualities which come into play only in times of crisis. If a CEO is a store house of such qualities, company is a most advantageous.

Without passion, you don’t have any energy and without energy you simply have nothing.                                                                         

                                                                                        Donald Trump

CEOs are like Vishnu and his incarnations of Sanatan Dharma of India, who presents himself the way needed to end a crisis and always aware of past, present and future. They must have solution for every crisis. They are like magicians; every time take out a pigeon from an empty satchel.  

What’s the recipe for success? Start with energy, initiative and intelligence, then add a dash of integrity, a pinch of honesty, two shakes of generosity and a heavy pour of the willingness to do more than your share.

                                                                                           Warren Buffett

Yatha Raja thatha parja is the dictum. People would behave as the King does. So a company is what its Chief Executive Officer is. He is the face and reputation of the company.