Stress : Lighten and Brighten-Formula

Stress

Lighten and Brighten-Formula

Lighten your body and enlighten you mind

 

Railways and other passenger carriers always insist that the passengers should travel with the minimum luggage for the simple reason that it provides more mobility, comfort to passengers and help the railway staff to keep the coach clean and perform their other duties. It also helps better circulation of air and effective air conditioning system. We must apply the same concept to our dwelling, keep it clear of the clutter - the things we have not used for years together and sometimes for decades together - the dwelling would look clean, more spacious, orderly, free of insects, lizards and with better ambience for family members as well as the guests; even otherwise cleanliness is loved by all. Throw out the clutter, stress too.

 

 “Outer order contributes to inner calm.” —Gretchen Rubin

 

A place for everything and everything in its place.”

                                                                    Benjamin Franklin

 

Obesity, in the common man’s language, means the state of being well above one's normal body weight. What is the normal body weight; most widely accepted norms are 50/45.5 Kg + 2.3 Kg per inch above five feet of height for male and female respectively. Irrespective of the technical details of weight and BMI, over weight is the cause of number of diseases like hypertension, diabetes, breathing problems, asthma, osteoarthritis, gallbladder problems,

 etcetera. Obesity is mother of all diseases, kill it before it kills you. It reduce mobility and also the romance activity – unliked by every human being; as the theory is youth comes; never goes, increases the danger of falling from upper berth in train, face accusing eyes in a public bus, getting stuck in economy seat of aeroplane. Those who are overweight must shade extra weight that will make them energetic, swift, smart, handsome and beautiful too, lesser expense on clothes with easy availability of the model skin fit clothes and lessor chances of above diseases. Reduce your weight to be free from stress. 

 

Most of us continue to drink cold drinks, tea, coffee, milk, energy drinks, shakes, fruit juice, mock drinks, yoghurt, and many add to it alcohol in the evening, some during day too, in addition to good three meals a day plus munching so much of sweets, savoury snacks and chocolates. Nobody counts the calories nor is bothered about the quantity, quality of intake and also the harmony between various contents added to the belly. We are, in fact, very ruthless and indisciplined with our stomach- the master but we treat it like a servant, stuff it with all the nonsense. If one could see the mixture one’s stomach has to handle, he will not eat anything for the next one week. Result is constipation, loose motion, acidity, gas, stomach pain, upset intestines, nausea, vomiting like sensation are common. Nothing much is required to be done except to be ruthless without mercy with self-denial for taste, tongue and greed. Both eating should always be less than the hunger and timely. It is better to skip when it is excessively late; do not disturb the system so late at night and so on. Similarly easing out should be regular and complete. If it does not happen, it is a cause of many diseases not only of stomach and intestines but also the heart and pancreas, mood swings and anxiety. Make sure that this happens complete, quick and regular so that the system remain fresh and vibrant and you stress free glowing.

 

We should keep our engagements limited and should be choosy as whom to meet, that would provide much time for self, family, loved ones, parents and to take care of problems both short time as well as the long term goals. Internet a gift to humanity has given us mobility without moving at all. We can remain in touch with everybody with whom we like; it is like Hindu Gods whose movement system was so strong that they could appear at any time at any place and this is true of them even today; as they are beyond space and time. Corona that way is a blessing in disguise; has taught the human beings everywhere how to carry on life meeting the minimum number of people, minimizing needs and staying at home. This will also reduce unnecessary entanglement in the affairs of others and hence a contributor to remain free from issues, anxiety and stress as well.

 

Free time is a luxury a few get and a time comes when everybody has that asset in ample. If one has free time even a few minutes: as you are retired; or doing your vocation from home, that times goes waste if not utilized for something even for leisure. Many people these days join time management trainings to learn how to use the spare time purposefully and creatively. Waste time is a loss for the individual as well as the group to which he belongs ultimately to the humanity. If all human being use their waste time with a purpose there would be no poverty or disease in this world. Since we live a social system which gives many good things to its citizens so the spare time, if any, should be used for welfare of the people around even for your loved ones and social cause. If nothing we should help the less advantageous people near like our helps, to carry one their life more peaceful and purposefully, this will provide one feeling of satisfaction of having returned to the society and create a feeling among others that they are being looked after. Both would have less stress more satisfaction.

 

Leisure is the time for doing something useful. This leisure the diligent person will obtain the lazy one never.

 

                                                                 Benjamin Franklin

 

Guard well your spare moments. They are like uncut diamonds.                                           Ralph Waldo Emerson

 

Whenever one has to go to a new place, attend some ceremony for the first time, meet somebody, do something for the first time, posted to a new branch or a new portfolio, some people are always found lacking in some information, aggressively pleading having never done before, ignorant about the protocol and the etiquettes to be observed; this creates stress with sensitive people. One must gather information, details, timings, consequences of intended activity to avoid awkward situations, unnecessary moments of stress and sometimes embarrassing too. Never be afraid, learn, search, gather, everybody starts with a pebble before he could move a mountain, everybody starts by doing for the first time. It is bad excuse to say have never done before.  Enlighten beforehand, be smart and stress free.  

 

Human mind is such a wonderful gift of the Lord that it is always working; it is something different from the flesh and bones the body is made of. It is not even the brain. It  takes one to the green pastures, valleys, mountains, beaches, dance parties, rave parties, honey moon, makes one to fly high in the skies and meet the Lord and what not; it  also makes one to weep, recollect the bad memories, irritates the mood and can also take you to drains. When the Lord has given us such a wonderful thing then use it for one’s own benefit. Recollect the good moments, be creative with positive thoughts, throw away the bad thoughts as bad dreams, do not go after irritants, leave where they were and be happy and stress free.

 

Every human being is reservoir of knowledge even if he has not obtained any formal education, my mother was one such person, she was expert in correcting the sprains of ankle and wrists she performed it free and always felt happy to do. Life is a great teacher, it teaches where education system fails to part with, beyond the system, this created by nature even for animals, it is excellent and extraordinary. Knowledge is lot of labour and sacrifices. If you have any knowledge, skill, expertise, or a God’s gift distribute it free for the benefit of others, it will sharpen your wisdom, understanding, prudence, give you solace and satisfaction, earn for you respect, regards and the blessing of those who are relieved of pain. Be generous and be stress free.

 

Ego-the idea or opinion that one has of himself especially the level of ability, intelligence, confidence and importance as a person: he considers himself superior-where as those who consider themselves above others in any respect are suffering from inferiority complex. It is assertion of “I &Me”, making the doer supreme instead of the action-Lord says it is the action that is important not the doer. In that sense ego is a negative trait. If you have that in any number, quantity, manner, throw it away: nobody can convince a person about this trait but a pure soul can. The reward would be enormous - respect, regard, love, affection, grace and what not: a change of attitude and outlook above all happiness stress-free.

 

Khudi Ko Kar Buland Itna Ke Har Taqdeer Se Pehle

Khuda Bande Se Khud Puche, Bata Teri Raza Kya Hai

Meaning

 

Develop the self so that before every decree

God will ascertain from you: “What is your wish?”

Allama Iqbal

 

Take your soul up to the higher levels of consciousness. Go to lap of Almighty. Make a habit to pay your obeisance to the Almighty the way you like best suited to you no rituals only total surrender. Feel presence of the God in and around you and in every fate, task, advantage, loss, coming to one’s way and be happy and stress free.

 

Massage the rubbing and kneading of muscles and joints of the body with the hands, especially to relieve tension or pain. It is a system of curing the pains and sprains, the world over particularly used in India more frequently by wrestlers.  It relaxes body, calms nerves, stretches connective tissue, relieves tired and aching muscles, improves blood circulation, reduces swelling, and

improves skin glow. In addition it promotes sleep, enhances self-esteem, relieves anxiety, tension, stress and negativity too, without side effects, lightens mentally and physically too. It is a romance, relaxation, a blessing apparent, also known as patting enjoyed by humans as well as animals.

 

 “Massage is the only form of physical pleasure to which nature forgot to attach consequences.” – Robert Breault

 

Lighten, enlighten, brighten,

live long and be stress-free. 

Self-Appraisal A Tool For Stress-Free Living

 

Self-Appraisal

 A Tool For Stress-Free Living

 

Without proper self-evaluation,

failure is inevitable.

                                                                            John Wooden

 

While walking up the ramp of the Gorton Castle, the building that once housed in summers the British Government of India, Central Secretariat Shimla, where I had joined as an Auditor in the office of Accountant General Punjab, a few months earlier in late sixties, one of senior colleagues, known as Swamiji, softly whispered, “while doing office work you discuss sometimes unpleasant issues with the Superintendent”. He advised, “make it sober and soft, if Superintendent felt hurt, he may spoil your annual confidential report (ACRs).” Confidential Report! Greek to me at that time. Slowly it transpired that the boss was required to maintain a register of quality of work done for each employee and write his impressions at the end of each month, as an aid for writing ACRs; when checked up to our surprise we found entries made were very pleasant. ACRs writing was a tricky job and bosses did not write for months together when due, building pressure on employees due for advancement in their career.

 

Subsequently, this was changed and every employee was required to submit a self-resume of the work done during the relevant period; before appraisal was written, majority found it an uphill task ran after those who had grip over expression and language. What to write; what not to write was the question and that would decide one’s  level of performance and grading too. That was how got introduced to self-appraisal in life.

 

Wilbur Pierce said, “Rare is the person who can weigh the faults of others without putting his thumb on the scales.” Equally true is self–assessment without exaggerating one’s qualities and camouflaging one’s faults, that started happening with resume too.

 

Self-appraisal, self-audit, self-justification for actions, require sincerity and integrity: not honesty but much above, with oneself. In fact, as Thales said, “The most difficult in life is to know yourself.” It is a meditation, realization of self, with honesty, genuineness and truthfulness; not everybody’s cake. There is no place for self-deceit in the theorem of sincerity with self; it’s a wisdom pure and selfless; it is a feeling, a intellect, a introspection, sometimes it is OK to take a step back and admit you are being ridiculous; but seldom we do. Majority of us think others’ wealth and self-wisdom always greater; majority tries to prove the others wrong and himself wiser than the others, the root cause of many disruptions, disputes, and distractions in life.

 

How to assess oneself; no procedure is prescribed; everybody would suggest different. It is an issue which is ‘me to me’ very delicate requiring lot of courage and strength. However, one way is a meeting with self. Every day at close; arrange a meeting with self, a meeting with conscious crystal clear, setting aside ego the “I and me” and analyzing whether everything during the day was done according to the voice of conscious particularly; the apparently wrong things like talking to someone in high pitched tone, not obeying elders, not listening to juniors, particularly your wife mostly treated as junior in every respect in our society, any dishonest act with a stranger or your helps like guards, maids, pressman, garbage man - many treat them sub-human being and actually it makes the so called boss a person, an inferior man, any other thing which you feel should not have been done that way. If you feel it should have been done other way round reconcile yourself and correct in the days to come, be conscious of it, some situations are easy to correct, for such others only a realization is needed. It will help one to avoid such situations in future and add a chapter of satisfaction in one’s life and make one wiser, brighter and acceptable.

 

Modern management has many ways to make self-assessment; one being SWOT (Strengths, Weaknesses, Opportunities, Threats) analysis. Fundamental is the knowledge and admission of ones weaknesses- skill, experience, knowledge, character traits, habits, desiring more than deserving etcetera, never make them an excuse for non-performance always try to improve or live up the expectations; when wrong happens be quick to admit that would give strength and wisdom too but be careful who you share your weaknesses, some people can’t wait for the opportunity to use it against you.

 

 “In most cases, strengths and weaknesses are two sides of the same coin. A strength in one situation is a weakness in another, yet often the person can’t switch gears. It’s a very subtle thing to talk about strengths and weaknesses because almost always they’re the same thing.”

                                                                               Steve Jobs

 

“Remember weakness of attitude becomes weakness of character.                                                              

                                                                               Albert Einstein

 

Threat is the next to be taken care of; most of the threats are from outside and are taken care of well; but the threats from inside, your conscious, attitude, character, habits, even the way you talk and address people, are very serious and require strength and courage to overcome e.g. excessive dislike for a person, not forgetting the past, furious anger, grievous greed for something, short temperament etc. Take care of them in a sensible manner and it is the “YOU” alone who can correct it and make your person respectable; prudent.

 

Strengths and opportunities apparently simple issues but they require more sensible handling. A person must be aware of his strengths like humility, meticulousness, patience, listening, calmness, clarity, expression and control of language, good physique, ingenuity, being imaginative, skills, knowledge, etc. Mind it, not easy to do, has to be done. Never over exhibit them; use when required; people are too quick to allege ego that may hurt you. Never be over-confident: this turns a strength into weakness.

 

Great opportune moments come rarely in life, but once they come and are ceased appropriately they change the course of one’s life; otherwise every moment is opportune moment, catch a moment and make it: that is, what required in life.

 

“A wise man will make more opportunities than he finds.”   

                                                                          Francis Bacon.

 

“In the middle of difficulty lies opportunity.”

                                                                         Albert Einstein

 

Action has always been superior to speech; it makes you a man of promise, performance, results and delivery; earns respect, regards and remuneration too sometimes. Action is the essence of life. It will make your self-analysis more meaningful with lesser corrections and more satisfaction. It is the wisdom of ages, sages and scriptures too all the times. Do not speak for action; let the action speak for itself; doer is not important if you make it so, loss would be yours, makes you haughty but action is important. Act as devotion to divine, as your love, like, and hobby; reward is inbuilt and you need not work again. Play the game well goals are in built. Prepare thoroughly marks are just judgments of an evaluator. 

 

“The superior man is modest in his speech,

but exceeds in his actions.”                              Confucius.

 

Confucius further said, “He who conquers himself is the mightiest warrior.” How to conquer oneself that is question. There are no yardstick nor standard operating procedures as for Corona, to judge who is the winner. Judge yourself against the well-established moral norms: lust, greed, attachment, ego and anger; this perhaps too much to expect, exceptionally difficult to comply and perhaps next to impossible to achieve for a common ordinary man the category to which majority of us belong. However, if we bring down the scale of scriptures, this concept can be understood more easily. Grade yourself sincerely on the scale of 1 to 10, on any subject connected with above five moral values for example-how touchy you are. My assessment is nobody would agree that he is touchy. But that is not the way. Simple way to judge is how quickly one gives negative reply to most ordinary and positive questions, seldom agrees to advice, suggestion, always has alternative than the one under discussion, never agrees to apparent wrong, question is replied by a question, always on the side of the problem never with the solution, has always something to make his point, seldom a man of praise for others and their actions, all these indicate the existence of ego. See for yourself how much nearer you are to the basic concept that would help in self-assessment, evaluation and appraisal. Tough job but essential to perform to know yourself and remain stress free.

 

Another yard stick for self-appraisal, is self-imposed discipline that is also known as self-denial-when you can do something but you restrain yourself from doing. Those who impose discipline on themselves they are always gainers in one respect or the other; sometimes may not be in the intended direction, ultimately they are. It is jewel of human character; it is for the individual to decorate himself or not. It requires a determination, firm will to do, inner strength. Those who try to impose discipline on others are loser most of the times because the direction may meet with a retort vocal or otherwise. SID is a sacrifice and helpful in self-evaluation.

 

With self-discipline most anything is possible.

                                                                   Theodore Roosevelt

 

No one can win all the time. But you have got to learn from all you do both successes and failures. Always do a self-assessment.

                                                                          Michael Sachs

 

One can also adopt a more simple approach of pros and cons or say cause and effect of every situation, life presents on a platter. Think it, in a broader sense; not always from the point of view of self, earning, money or favours. In fact, these are very small things in life; not always helpful; for example when you have joined King’s service-now Government service; think for the welfare of the people, development or defence of the country; country’s relationship with other countries; how to make the life of people easy and also the honest ways of earning. But if you think of yourself it is unethical and dangerous it may cost your job. When working for an organization work for its aims and objective; it is where your character, sense of self analysis and integrity would be tested.

 

If still not able to proceed, remember age old sayings, “Think before you leap.” “Think before you speak.” “Think before you act.” They are time tested and well established. If you do not understand then you have only to repent your wisdom as some actions can’t be reversed; for example when you were required to attend somebody’s cremation but you did not attend, obviously it can’t be reversed.

 

It is up to you to choose between happiness and stress. If there are 100 reasons for being unhappy, there are 1000 reasons for being happy - we need to always try to find out those reasons and remain happy.

 

Edit your life frequently and ruthlessly. It is your masterpiece after all.                                    

                                                                             Nathan Morris

 

You are the master of the show-the Life, direct it well and be happy.

Stress-Free Old Age Golden Period of Life

Stress-Free Old Age

          Golden Period of Life

 

Old age, believe me, is a good and pleasant thing.

It is true you are gently shouldered off the stage, but then you are given a comfortable front stall as spectator.

Confucius

 

Corona the Chinese Virus has brought many things with it: masks, hand-wash, sanitizers, social distancing but the worst is a direction to senior citizens to remain at home: not to venture out. Evil is that it has made persons like me at 76+, to realize that we have grown old; earlier I used to go out for walk of five six kilometers daily and on way back fetched milk and vegetables for the family. Some normally stress-free are feeling under stress. Even otherwise old age has its own problems Corona has added to the list.

 

Having lived for almost 45-50 years with one’s own created family the time comes when the kids start flying; daughters having gone to in-laws and sons have their own grown up kids with their education, employment and settlement issues. Generation gap is but natural which is widening more because, the traditional lifestyle grandparents followed has been replaced by the modern style more open and individualistic dear to the present generation; and also to middle generation their compulsion. Perhaps future generations will have to face it in sharper proportions. Even when you are with the modern day joint family, elders feel alone and loneliness sharpens if children and their kids move out; justifying age old saying water water everywhere not a drop to drink.

 

Then the God given partner your spouse comes to your rescue. Enjoy early morning get up with her and a hot cup of tea with devotional songs and of course the morning news on TV. A stroll in the nearby park or settling the overnight scramble of utensils, peels, setting up of beds, and wrappers at home give another opportunity to have second cup of tea or the green tea the modern day health drink with immunity mixture added to ward off Corona. What a wonderful morning where is the loneliness. Go to the market with spouse bring milk, vegetables, bread, butter and of course what he likes may be Soda for colourful evening or a pizza base, talk breakfast and take bath, before you enjoy the first meal, half the day is over for a complete man (better half + worst half, the Ardhnarishwar Lord Shiva and Adi Shakti in one body as per Indian scriptures), so comes the evening and night follows. Newspaper has been thrown out by COVID19, but a pleasant nap after every meal is a luxury.

 

Enjoy every second of your company with spouse without restrictions, romance, evening drinks, crispness of a biscuit, fragrance of the bitter gourd, sweet smell coming from the freshly cooked chapattis, sweetness of onions damped in apple vinegar, of course the physical love of early days of marriage forgetting the so called age, a number only and remembering the cosy huge of a bride.

 

“Age is an issue of mind over matter. If you don’t mind, it doesn’t matter.”

                                                   – Mark Twain

 

“There is a fountain of youth: it is your mind, your talents, the creativity you bring to your life and the lives of people you love. When you learn to tap this source, you will truly have defeated age.”                  

                                                   – Sophia Loren

 

Enjoy the way you like, with your spouse, it has never been irrelevant and non-performer only the ways change, slower the speed, longer the time better it is , mind is free of addition, it has always been a source of happiness, concentration, satisfaction, a bliss everyone longs for, of course medicine for many ailments. So do not be afraid, it is gift of God continue to enjoy till depart to His abode.   

 

In case one happens to be alone which everybody has to be one day or the other; learn how to enjoy solitude. It requires time, patience, and of course change of attitude to master this magic. Think positive, be a silent spectator of the drama of life the novel God wrote before you were born. The mind gets enormous amount of rest, and a day’s silence gives you more energy. If you are able to keep your mind blank for a while; this is the sole purpose of meditation, you can enjoy solitude and you will find it empowering. This is the time to turn to Him and seek his blessing, love, company and empowerment.

 

Alone let him constantly meditate in solitude on that which is salutary for his soul, for he who meditates in solitude attains supreme bliss.

                                                              Guru Nanak

 

We need to find God, and he cannot be found in noise, and restlessness. God is friend of silence. See how nature-trees, flowers, grass-grows in silence; see the stars, the moon and the sun they move in silence. We need silence to be able to touch souls. 

                                                              

                                                         Mother Teresa

Daring individuals take daring decisions; not to the taste of family or the society or elders if they happen to be alive, they dictate, live life at their own terms; are not many but their number is increasing a positive sign of independence in old age instead of facing irritants. They adopt in the old age live-in relationship-modern day concept the youth adopts-to enjoy sex and still to remain free and uncommitted - and thus spend their time in a company instead of being lonely and wandering here and there. It is good approach, it gives purpose to life and living; gives independence of and being burden to, blood and other relations. One becomes master of his own world and happy.

 

In fact a man is never alone He is always with him, He is always at his back and call, if the man happens to be sincere to the core.

 

Body is another reasons to be taken care of in the evening of life. Enjoy everything you like, reduce the intake cereals, butter, sugar, salt, total quantity, calories, fat, white bread, non-veg and veg also. Follow the routine and timing, increase liquid intake, water the wonderful drink, limited quantity of tea and milk, butter-milk, curd, coconut water, fruit juices etc. With passage of time the capacity of the body to absorb essentials from the natural food decreases; food supplements are essentials with the advice of the physician if possible from the one who has taken care of you for so long.

 

Exercise light and that your body absorbs easily, be part of your routine like walking, neck rolls, clapping, deep breathing, stretching,  simple yoga and pranayama will keep the disease like cervical, constipation, stiffness of joints, miles away and your mood up without swings.

 

Take bath with warm water, even during summers that will help to keep your joints moving with melted joint grease, increase blood circulation, dip your feet in as hot water as you can tolerate for just five-ten minutes everyday day that will keep your feet and legs free from pain and fresh. Where is the time, people normally say, it has to be carved out of your routine if not possible do it when taking bath.

 

If suffering for age related diseases like diabetes, hypertension, osteoporosis, asthma, etc. take medicine regularly without fail; let it be sweet dish after meals. Enjoy taking medicine; they are the life giver and freshen your moods and moves. 

 

Health is not just about eating or not eating; it is also about what you are thinking and saying. Keep your thoughts positive, and say whatever you want to say simple, straight, polite and polished. Negative thoughts and improper utterings disturb your thinking as well as your digestive system, negatively altering absorption of food and nutrition by body, increasing the intake of antacids.

 

Knee pain is a general issue in old age. Continue to take milk and sunshine. One thing which life taught me is, take a few drops of almond oil or flex seed on your palms and massage gently the both the knees clockwise and equal number anti clock-wise for 5-7 minutes daily it will give relief. If no time do this exercise, do when sitting on the pot while answering the call of nature and be pain free in the long run. Make this a part of daily routine. 

 

Do not collect, children are settled, more you collect more the worries. Think of spending for your joy, happiness and moods without limits and hesitations, occasional everything is allowed and is fruitful. My father-in-law when he was eighty six, his spouse eighty, dismantled his home and house both, kept with him only his personal belongs, clothes and a bag for medicine, distributed large portion of his realizations as per his choice, balance everything with the Bank, despite my opinion to the contrary and he lived with his daughters three in number, his remaining life up to ninety two years and had a peaceful end. He had no regrets and always happy and enjoyed. I have still to see another person doing all this. Try if somebody else can.

 

Make a list of things you would like to do say during the next one year if you happen to be alive by that time, as many of us have already crossed the national life expectancy of 68.7 years in India and 78.7 years in USA. This will give you a goal, a purpose to live and a happiness when you achieve it with the added advantage of nostalgia for a period - more you have enjoyed longer is the feeling.

 

Power to decide is a miracle, God has given ample to a man. Use it fully do not depend on others, or ask others to decide, you have the power of deliberation, discussion and decision; talk to the persons who listen to your ideas and not to the persons who want to put their own achievements before you. Positive criticism is always good and people know how to put it across. Those who do not know don’t listen to them. Never carry the bricks from the old house to make a new one, that is the key to sweetness of relationships. Let things of the past die in past and live in the present. Decide your affairs with His blessing only.

 

New, variety, different, extra, can be anything-visit to a friend, holiday, different vegetable, even the great Indian  fruit chat, papri chat, samosa chat, Chat (not talk in a friendly and informal way) shoot of a seed you had sown, new necktie, petticoat for your wife,

dinner at road side, sitting mouth to mouth and back to back, halwa at 03.00AM, unplanned vacations, and whatever different you can think of, always gives moments of happiness and surprise so continue to find and make whenever possible; be stress free.

 

Laughter is an ornament Lord has given to man only. Be grateful to the Lord express your gratitude by laughing as long as one can afford daily; it gives exercise to one’s face and stomach muscles; improves face glow and digestion and to be happy stress-free.

 

“You don’t stop laughing when you grow old, you grow old when you stop laughing.”

                                        – George Bernard Shaw

 

Money is another necessity of old age. If you have money enjoy to the extent you can, keeping some powder dry for rainy days. If one does not have sufficient use your determination and decision leaving aside so called family honour. Take annuity of an amount equal to the estimated monthly expenditure on property you have, from a Bank (India has a law for that for senior citizens) and live peacefully. Always keep your money safe liquidity ensured, some nearby, with spouse, never be zero, money is next important to spouse.

 

Those without money and property should take benefit of all Govt. social security schemes available in the country along with all free facilities for senior citizens that would help to a large extent. Do not hesitate to avail facilities from the charitable institutions like free medical a galore in India. Still not able to manage join charitable Old-Age home now there are many in every Indian city. Wherever you stay be grateful to the individual concerned and useful to the institution thus earning your salt. Old-Age homes are, in fact our right, we the seniors, have contributed to the society for about forty-fifty long years or so, may not be directly but self-denial is also a mode of contribution. 

 

The best relations to take care in Indian context are your own children particularly your sons, if not comfortable with them, there should be no hesitation to shift to daughters but it is always slightly uncomfortable. Those who have daughters only there is no choice. These days there is great allurement for children to shift abroad for the “Azadi”, the great independence, freedom, free from encumbrances,  in addition to green pastures, but I have still to see a son taking his parents even when terminally ill, with him abroad permanently despite being well placed in a few cases.  Parents are generally invited only for delivery or education adjustments of grandchildren. It is only occasional parents are called for comfortable stay for limited days even then they are dispatched  quickly to India if they develop illness to save as medical treatment is too costly there and dollars and pounds are quickly converted into INRs. In the end one concludes: old-age should be free of this jugglery of relations only then one can be comfortable, so enjoy with your spouse and when alone enjoy solitude.

 

Sometimes one has hard responsibilities even in old age like widow daughter, aged parents, crippled spouse, income not enough: then everybody has to contribute and compromise with the circumstances to live a peaceful life so that utensils do not make a noise to spoil the taste of the food. Always remember old age is a journey not a destination; nobody knows who will drop first; be passengers in the same coach always be cooperative and helpful. Keep everybody happy their needs first and continue journey to enjoy. Have firm faith in Him and that this is all left-over from the previous life, all of us believe so firmly may not admit. Journey has to be performed, so perform as if you are in His lap. Life happens. Embrace the change. Make the most of everything that comes in the way.       

 

Retirement gives you ample time to do what you always wanted and you never thought of, when you want to do it, where you want to do it and how you want to do it.

 

        Retirement has been discovery of beauty for me. I never         had the time before to notice the beauty of my grandkids,         my wife, the tree outside my very own front door and the         beauty itself.

                                                                                Hartman Jule 

 

Old age is your own creation: it can be misery, it can    be celebration, it can simply be a despair and it can also be a dance. It all depends how deeply you are to accept the existence, whatsoever it brings.                                                                                                          Osho